Tica (aka Toots haha!) is learning all about life on the farm. Before coming to live here, she lived in an apartment. So, it’s no wonder that she has been going nonstop with curiosity at all the new things in and around the house and barn. This is a whole new world for her to explore. She definitely has the excitement and desire to check out every single bit of it. Every time we leave the house, she wants to go somewhere new. She’s a great example of jumping into life and getting excited about all the little (and big) things {ie: horses}.

As a Soul Level Animal Communicator®, I have been looking for ways Tica is going to be working with me on my Soul Level Lessons. It’s totally possible one of the behaviors she is using to teach me a lesson is to be curious about everything! I’ve been staying open and curious to the possibilities because I know she chose me as her person for a reason.

Wouldn’t you know it…just over a week into her new life, the first major Soul Level Lesson showed up. Our little Tica had a rough initiation into life as a farm dog. Despite my best efforts to keep my little adventurer safe, Tica broke her leg! As her person, I believe it is my responsibility to give her a good life and keep her safe. I really felt like I failed at this job! Even worse, she had only been here 10 days!

All of my negative beliefs got kicked up full force as I was rushing her to the vet:
I’m not a good enough dog mom! You’re not worthy of having a dog! I’m a terrible person! I should have known better!

Once the initial trauma response calmed and Tica was splinted up, I was able to take a minute to look at the situation and ask myself, “What is the lesson I’m supposed to learn from all this?” I checked in with my spirit guides, who reminded me of the importance of being able to forgive myself. Ding, ding, ding! That hit home hard for me. This is something I have struggled with for a really long time. Umm, lifetimes actually! It’s actually one of the bigger lessons I incarnated into this lifetime to continue to work on because I didn’t do so great with it in previous lives.

Forgiveness is such a big deal: forgiveness of others and forgiving ourselves.

Often, it can be easier to forgive others for their shortcomings or mistakes than to forgive ourselves. We can be so hard on ourselves! If a friend had gone through the exact same situation that Tica and I went through, I would have had much more compassion for them and what they are going through. I would have reminded them to not continue to beat themselves up over and over again, because they are doing the best they can. Somehow, when it comes to me, it’s completely different—but it shouldn’t be!

Because of my training as a Soul Level Intuitive Coach® and the work I do coaching my clients around negative beliefs, I am able to recognize how being hard on myself is actually a way I have learned to protect myself. It sounds kinda silly or backwards, but it’s true. If I judge myself the harshest, it hurts less if/when other people are judgmental of me. Now that I acknowledge that this workaround of self judgment has actually helped me feel safe for a really long time, I can start to shift my negative belief around being not good enough. I think it’s kind of amazing that I learned this about myself because that means I’m ready to change it! It’s a process and takes a little time, but I can do it gently and not force myself into change before I’m ready.

Deep soul level growth happens gracefully not aggressively.

My homework now is to continue to notice when I’m feeling judgmental of myself in other areas of my life and where I can offer some compassion and a bit of forgiveness. It’s from that energetic space in my heart that shifting and healing can happen so that I no longer need to use self-criticism and self-judgment as protection. 

By the way, I also connected in with Tica to see what she had to say about this whole thing. She immediately responded with “I’m ok! Look at me go!” Tica whirled around the kitchen with her stumpy little leg, and then bounced over into my lap to give me kisses. Forgiveness received—not that she blamed me at all for what happened. Still, it was great to be reminded she loves me no matter what, especially through the craziest and hardest parts of my soul’s journey.

~Thank you, Tica, for choosing me! <3